Always replace the gas nozzle
before driving away from the pump.
I will always "check for paper"
when leaving the restroom.
I will try to drive closer to the speed limit.
I will always wear clean underwear, "just in case".
I will keep an extra safe distance when driving behind police cars.
I will no longer park the BMW
next to fire hydrants.
and never again will I try to diffuse an explosive device with the help of a known practical joker.